Everybody hates Ino
by Kilee Drifter
Summary: Lol. Ino gets killed in each chapter so don't read if you like Ino. I'm serious. Character death in each chapter so yeah. And yes, I know I will be flamed further. discontinued cuz i'm bored
1. Itachi

**MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA! SORRY INO FANS BUT DON'T READ. I DON'T TOLERATE FLAMES.**

**DISCLAIMER: THE ANIME NARUTO DOES NOT BELONG TO ME, NOR DO INO AND ITACHI. I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUN TO KILL INO. AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN. **

**MORE CHAPTERS COMING SOON.**

**Owari.**

_ Kilee Drifter._

_

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Ino meets Itachi._

"I'm like, so pretty and awesome. I love Sasuke-kun. Sasuke-kun. Sasuke-kun. You will be mine Sasuke-kun! Sakura has a big forehead. She's ugly. She has no chance as Sasuke-kun's girl. That's like, my job." Ino said into the mirror.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Went the door.

"Sasuke-kun!" I know you loved me! We can like, be boyfriend and girlfriend forever!" Ino said. She ran to the door and opened.

Then she met Itachi. But his katana was the only thing she ever saw of him. And all she saw was it going through her heart.

Itachi laughed and cleaned his sword. "Don't mess with my brother. I want him not to have an obsessive fangirl as a wife someday."

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**Ok, no bashing from Ino fans. I don't like that idiot so if you don't like it, don't read. I don't aprreciate stuff like that.**


	2. Zetsu

**My brothers favorite character is Zetsu so of course I figured...well...eat her! lol. I know I'm gonna get flamed by Ino haters or whoever the heck thinks this ain't really awesome. Yeah if you're anti-Ino, come here. If you wanan complain, or if you ain't anti-Ino, oh well. Flame me. After all, it's your opinion. Freedom of speech and all that. Blah blah blah. Why are you still here? Read the not bold print. Oh, and if you think this story is bad because it's 3-7 lines about killing Ino, read some different story of mine. This is a pure crackfic so it's not my best. Ok?**

**Oh, and I'm tired of always typing a disclaimer. Zetsu, Lee, Shikamaru, Orochimaru, Sasuke, Sakura and Kabuto belong to Mashashi Kishimoto and I'm feeling like Shikamaru so legal rights comcerning all other mentioned characters are in Chapter 1. Ok? Thank you.**

_Kilee Drifter_

P.S: THANK YOU IF YOU ACTUALLY FOLLOWED DIRECTIONS AND DIDN'T FLAME ME. I appreciated it, espcially the Favs. I will kill Ino again for you people out there.

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_Recipe: Boar soap._

Zetsu flipped through the cookbook hungrily. What to eat?

"Hm...fried weasel, no." Itachi would kill him if Zetsu tried to stick him in a pot with onions again. The Uchiha was even worse of recovering from the infulence of sedatives. But of course Zetsu had that bad habit of confusing people for food based on names.

"Deers live...no. That Nara's too lazy I'd lose energy. Snake meat...no not him. Ew. Cherry blossom...is that even edible? It's a kind of flower...some flowers are edible...wonder if that pink-haired girl would taste good. Aconite? No I don't think that Kabuto would do well. (Yakushi Kabuto aconite poison/herb)

Boar soup. Sounds yummy. Now I think that blonde haired one might do well. I need some onions, boiling water, parsley, spices, chili powder. And Ino. (Ino boar or something like that which is why Sakura calls her Ino-pig.)

----

Far away at that same time, Ino was selling a few flowers to Lee.

"Ino! You're youthful but not in a good way, I mean...hey what's that?"

A green fog filled the Yamanaka flower shop.

"Sasuke? Is that like, you?" Ino said before passing out.

That night, Lee woke up just outside Konoha with no memory of what had happened. And Zetsu had some delicious tasting Ino soup, but he said it could have used a little less sugar. Ino was just too much of a flirt.


	3. Deidara

**Me no own Naruto ok? Thank you. Yay! This is now a tribute to Dei-dei chan! (glomps Deidara) The godfather!!!!**

**Deidara: Yes, but godfather of what, un?**

**Itachi: Deidara you need a crash course on what happened since...June. takes Deidara away.**

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_Flipside._

Deidara was in Konoha one day for a mission, not to capture Naruto but to track his growth. As he walked around in disguise he happened to come upon none other than Ino Yamanaka.

"Can I by some soil...something with a little sulfur for my "'flowers'?" Deidara said looking for an explosive element with which to kill others.

Ino looked at Deidara strangly. She'd never seen him before, but he looked a lot like her.

"Hey girl, you like, copied my beauty!" Ino said annoyed. Deidara twitched. Girl? That didn't sound right.

"Well it's not like I can blame you. You must want to impress some boy by like, dressing up as yours truly. Whatever! I would advise you to lose the black fishnet and get surgery on that like, virtually flat chest. And eat something girl, your hips are like, skinny!"

"I'm a boy, un!" Deidara said.

"I, LIKE, LOOK LIKE A DUDE!"

"No! I look like a chick, un!"

Ino looked at Deidara. Strangly at first, then with that crazy look like all fangirls have.

"I've, like, always been into guys with long hair. Here's your soil!" She handed him a small bag of sulfur rich soil.

"Well I'm leaving, un." Deidara said.

Ino was about to glomp him, but a small clay spider had crawled up to the top of her head using her freakishly long ponytail. I need not say mopre, after all, when Deidara's clay spiders/other animals come close to you, it's obvious what will happen next.

Walking away, Deidara chuckled. "Heh he heh. Art is a bang, and so is murder, un. Now let's see if this stuff works on the Jinchurrikki...and maybe Tobi, un!"


End file.
